Okay, been a while. I am coming out of blogging retirement and shaking the dust off my keyboard to tell all 3.25 of you that read this blog why I think you should attend the Tennessee Baptist Convention this year.
10. Free Stuff. Really, I rack up at least a dozen pens, a sack full of candy, and the occasional flashlight in the “exhibit area” every year.
9. Everything I have ever learned about parliamentary procedure I learned at the annual meeting. I go every year to hone my skills. For real though. . . I have ninja-like Robert’s Rules of Order skills!
8. Reading material. I like to collect the vast amount of informational brochures, magazines, books, and flyers. I proudly display these items in my church office to appear smarter and better connected than I really am.
7. Nomination speeches. I am waiting for the phrase “better than sliced bread” and “smarter than a 5th grader” to be heard while describing a candidate.
6. New this year. . . a 5k run. I am just praying that the cardiac care unit from Vandy is on hand with a defibrillator to revive our “pot luck” filled pastors.
5. “Other Business”. This is the dangerous category of the meeting that follows all pre-determined business where we let any credentialed messenger come to a microphone and say, literally, whatever is on their mind. Think I’ll come to microphone # 4 this year to make a motion that we ban the word “pastorium” from our collective Baptist vocabulary as it sounds just a little too much like crematorium.
4. I like being refered to as “credentialed”.
3. Name tags that identify everything I have ever done in Tennessee Baptist Life since I was on the cradle roll.
2. Dress casual vs. formal suit and tie guys. As usual I will be scanning the crowd to see if we finally go over 50% dress casual.
1. Of course the best reason to go is that God is working through our convention and I just want to be a part of it. I’ll see ya there!